$100 A Day!

I had no idea you can make $100 a day just for being a skank. Having a vagina comes with all kinds of perks!

Bret Michaels is currently looking for some entrepreneurial loveless young ladies to tour the world midwest with him on a bus. All you have to do is send in the following info, immediately:

* Name
* Age
* Phone number
* MySpace link
* A short bio
* And attach a recent photo of yourself
Send to: LArock@realtalentcasting.com 

The Rock of Love Bus with Bret Michaels is supposed to take the girls "out of the mansion and on the road in true rock star style."

All $100/day prostitutes must make sure they can deal with the difficulties of being on the road. No it's not just peeing on a moving bus. That's fun. It's stuff like "greeting aggressive groupies with a smile, enduring grueling schedules, dodging the advances of the warm-up band or even stepping in last-minute to fill in for delinquent roadies."

Sounds easy enough.

(source: blabbermouth)

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If You Like To Torture Yourself....

---------------------------------> Then Click Here <---------------------------------

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Ambre Lake!

Ambre has Bret's love!. Clever girl didn't wear panties to dinner. It always works! She flashed Bret her stuff between bites of chicken. Twice! Obviously Ambre needed to prove she's not boring. And of course when you're stuffing your face it's a perfect time to say 'I'm not wearing any underwear.' And the obvious response is exactly what Bret said: 'can I see.' Of course! It's dinner! So Ambre spread 'em like she's at the gyno with a mean itch. Help!

Wanna see Ambre win HERE. 

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Bitch Still Thinks She'll Be Picked!

Heather from Rock of Love has been interviewed by the VH1 Blog about coming back on the show this season. She's dying for a little Bret!

Heather says Bret started making out with her on the bed while the rest of the girls were outisde in bikinis puking into buckets:

They didn’t show everything. They didn’t show when I was in the bedroom with him, telling him about the girls. He was like, “You look really good,” and he starts making out with me. We’re rolling around on the bed while the girls are outside in the yard. 

I think I'd puke in her mouth if Heather started making out with me. And then go wait in line at emergy care for some antibacterial shit. Stat!

So Heather also has some advice on who Bret should pick if not her:

I really like Destiney, Ambre and Jessica. Some of the other girls don’t seem like they have any self-respect. They’re so desperate. They’re such followers and wannabes. They’ll do anything to get out of the situation they’re in. They just want a way out. They’re fake, desperate, easy gold-diggers and that’s not going to win Bret’s heart. He hates all of that.

Bret’s seen the best bodies, the best tits, the best ass. All of that. If you don’t have a brain, a heart and a soul, forget it

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"I Won't Puke On You Bret!"

video.vh1.com

Jessica isn't too innocent! So last night on Rock of Love, Bret Michaels brings back all the girls ex-boyfriends and Heather who has been keeping herself busy as a groupie for a Poison cover band on their bar tour. As you can imagine, all the boyfriends turn into emotional wrecks and the girls sink bodyshots and strip. Leather ass Heather get's the girls blasted, naked and talking shit about each other. They start calling Jessica too innocent, so of course, in her gold bikini, she ends up drunk, crying, and puking all over the place.

Heaven!

A couple of the girls kind of felt guilty so they kind of helped her make it into the bucket. Aim that shit!

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Too. Much. Bret. Michaels.

Seeing Bret Michael's weener in the sex tape was more than enough. Now he's coming out with an autobiography, Biography channel special and, nooooo, one more solo album.

The Poison is tainted! No taints! 

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Heather from Rock of Love Is A Poison Cover Band Groupie!

Heather didn't land the real Bret Michaels but maybe she'll have better luck with the fake one. The chick who tatted Bret's name on her is going on tour with Talk Dirty, a Poison cover band. Heather MySpace blogs it:

IN THE MEANTIME I AM GOING ON A US TOUR WITH TALK DIRTY, A POISON TRIBUTE BAND. WE ARE GOING ON TOUR IN DECEMBER. CHECK OUT MY CALENDAR TO SEE IF I AM COMING TO A TOWN NEAR YOU, SO YOU CAN COME PARTY WITH ME. THEY WILL BE CREATING MERCHANDISE U CAN GET AND BRING TO GET SIGNED AS WELL--SO, ADD TALK DIRTY TO YOUR FRIENDS AND KEEP AN EYE ON US!!

This is sooo rad! Get the fake Bret! Sing ballads and drink wine you bought at a gas station. And get "fake" tatted in front of your Bret Tattoo.

On a sidenote, Heather has had a rough month. Her hermit crabs died and her ferret ran away. Somebody stole her purse to.

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Jes Is Dating Someone Not Named Bret Michaels

Bret got played, bitches! First thing he said on Rock of Love was Bret Michaels ain't gettin' played. Well, shit happens! Especially to people who wear bandanas. Sorry, just a fact of life.

Jes the girl who won his heart over 11 weeks of boozy bitchin, called him up and said she's dating a clothing designer:

"Rock of Love" star Brett Michaels never even got started with the "girlfriend" he selected last season, Jes Rickleff. Sources tell The Post's Melissa Jane Kronfeld that Michaels was informed by the pink-haired punk rocker over the phone that she had taken up with a Chicago clothing designer upon returning home to the windy city.

Source

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Jes Did It For Rock Of Love

VH1 scored their second highest rating ever for the season finale of Rock of Love. You know, the episode where Bret Michaels asked the stripper and 22-year-old Jes to be his girlfriends, but ended up with Jes.

VH1 says 5.4 million viewers tuned in, to make the show the highest watched cable program of the night.

Who's next? I say we hook up some little kid from the Disney Channel with a bunch of older chicks!

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Jes Rocks Bret Michaels Love

Bret Michaels new girl is the lovely and talented Jes: a cosmetologist with four tattoos, nine piercings, has never cheated on a boyfriend and describes herself as very independent.

All it took was ten weeks and knocking out 19 bitches to get him.

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