Not Peachie!!

Peaches Geldof is through! Almost. The Sun says 19-year-old Peaches stopped breathing for a few minutes, was convulsing on the ground, and nearly died - all in the hands of her friend who was giving her mouth to mouth before emergency crews could make it to her lifeless body. And of course the reason why: overdose on the druggies!

A source explains to The Sun: 

“If she had not received this she could have died or she could have suffered brain damage. Peaches had gone into respiratory arrest, in which a patient’s breathing stops but the heart doesn’t."

“It was extremely serious and there is no doubt her friend saved her life.”

“No one could believe this has happened to Sir Bob Geldof’s daughter, particularly considering what happened to her mother.”

Her mother of course died of a drug overdose in 2000.

I love Peaches!! Please don''t go dyin' on us Peachie that would be so not cool.

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Of Course Ronnie Wood Ran Off With An 18-Year-Old Waitress

Life's short! Ronnie Wood is making the most of his time here on earth by having an affair with 18-year-old cocktail waitress from Russia. Ronnie, an on and off alcoholic, is supposedly drinking two bottles of vodka everyday. Hey days are long! He met this girl at a premiere party for The Stones documentary

Shine A Light. Next thing you know, Ronnies drunk and they're on a trip to his home in Ireland. Ronnies wife of 23 years says the couple have just gone on a painting trip together. Ronnie, of course, probably told her that. But the 18-year-old home wrecker is posting all kinds of things on Facebook. A friend of here's explains:

She is absolutely besotted with Ronnie. She has told everyone Ronnie has left his wife for her and they are a full-on item.

Ekaterina said Jo had told her she knew what was going on and begged her not to take her husband away. She claimed she told Jo, "I am not taking him. He is leaving."

Belows a thumbnail pic of Ronnie's weekend hooker.

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"Lily had to have her pee regularly checked"

Lily Allen is finally coming back to America. She's been banned from the country ever since the Canadians found pot on her tour bus. Even though it was the Canadians that found her weed, we wouldn't let her in either. Yeah, just for pot in another country. But that's not even the crazy part. The government has been drug testing her for months! And she passed! According to some source in England, the US government has been making Lily take pee tests on a regular basis:

"Lily had to have her pee regularly checked and then blood tests on top to prove she wasn't on drugs before the US government would give her a working visa."

"Lily felt like Big Brother was constantly watching her – it was freaky."

Well, congratulations! Time to throw a raging party!

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I Love The Crack Cocaine I Love The Crack Cocaine

Before Steve-O found religion and rehab, he was rapping about crack. Not just rapping about rapping. Saluting crack! But then he tried to shoot himself and hey put him jail. So here's the video of his life song:

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Science Lesson Of The Day: Kids On Energy Drinks Will Have Unsafe Sex, Take Drugs And Fight

See! It's not our fault! It's the caffeine and guarana. The sneaky drink making cockheads are tricking us into random sex and booze. According to some scientists and teachers, energy drinks are causing all kinds of crazy shizz to happen in the classrooms. Including sex, drugs and rock n' roll! Something like that. Here's what they say:

- "In Tigard, Oregon, teachers this month sent parents e-mail alerting them that students who brought energy drinks to school were "literally drunk on a caffeine buzz or falling off a caffeine crash."

- "High consumption of energy drinks is associated with "toxic jock" behavior, a constellation of risky and aggressive behaviors including unprotected sex, substance abuse and violence."

- "It appears the kids who are heavily into drinking energy drinks are more likely to be the ones who are inclined toward taking risks."

- "You're every bit as drunk, you're just an awake drunk."

- "Students who mixed energy drinks with alcohol got drunk twice as often as those who consumed alcohol by itself and were far more likely to be injured or require medical treatment while drinking."

If I ever get AIDS it's their fault! 

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Nooooooooooooooo!

Steven Tyler commited himself to suck, rehab, once again today. Yes! Aerosmith is going to blow forever! If you go to Flickr and type in "Steven Tyler Coachella" you'll see Steven with gaggles of girls and not looking very sober. It's pretty funny. Anyways,  TMZ says Steven checked into the same place Dr. Drew hangs out and films his show. That'll be fun. Back in 1998 after Steven got out of rehab last time he was asked if rock and roll is still the same without the sex and drugs. His answer rips:

No. I miss the insanity sometimes. The guy you're talking to who spent 23 years on the dark side of the moon, ripping people off and shooting cocaine with Penthouse models, kind of misses that side, yet I've gained so much more.

Not that much more! He just probably remembers much more. That's what sucks about being all lit up. You do the most awesome things. But can't remember any of it! It's like a secret, awesome life. You just know that infection wasn't there last week.

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Same The Mousies!

Sober people do this all the time! Cracked out Amy Winehouse and Pete Doherty have found some new friends in little baby mice. And they filmed it! They actually figured out how to do some pretty cool special effects with the camera, which is pretty cool. These hairless mice creep me out way more then the crackheads. Here you go:

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"I am a legend. I want to take drugs"

"I am a legend... I want to take drugs" was what Amy Winehouse was screaming in the road the first time she was arrested. Now that she's been released from jail a the second time, there's no way she's all lit up. Yeah right!

Last night, just after she was set free, she was spotted at a gas station at 4am buying magazines and drinks. You need something to pass the night away! It's cold out there!

But you know Wino is fine. You can always tell because her huge nappy mop gets clean. She remembers to take the foil out. It's not stuck in the naps!

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Invaluable Advice From Keith Richards

Always pay attention to your elders. They know stuff! It's usually annoying BS that they tell you over and over, but yeah. Ok it only really matters if your elder is Keith Richards. So you can learn to survive mad benders in foriegn countries. Screw Bear Grylls, that guy doesn't know shit. Keith knows how to skip out on school and other useful facts. Here's Keef from a Blender interview:

Become a rock star if you want to avoid exercise:

“I don’t need to exercise. I’m in the Rolling Stones, and I’ve got a great old lady. What more do I need?”

Become a rock star if you want to avoid school:

“I thought, I don’t understand a fucking word of this. I’d better concentrate on the guitar playing. Next thing I knew, I was wearing orange socks and looked like Elvis Presley.”

You can still break your nose while using cocaine:

“I was doing a lot of blow and everything was just too interesting for me to go to bed. I was quite lucid. Then I hit the speaker. I even remember the make — it was a JBL."

Next time you're in a fight, make sure you're holding a guitar. If not, do this:

“Go for the knee in the nuts, and then smack his head against something hard — his mate’s head, if there’s two of them. And get a good first punch in. You can’t underestimate the element of surprise.”

Even Keith Richards is scared of dying:

“I’ve been close enough: car crashes, shoot-outs, strychnine overdoses. That’s where you can see everything, but you can’t move a muscle. It’s like being buried alive. I actually left my body when Anita and I turned over a Mercedes convertible. It bounced three times. I can still describe every rivet on the underside of that car.”

And just because you're a rock star you still need to learn some matters:

“I’m a much broader character than people think. It’s not all ah-har! and slitting throats in dark alleyways. I cook my own breakfast, and I make a very nice cup of tea.”

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Mick Jones Is Calling

Mick Jones of The Clash is chiming in on Pete Doherty rotting away in his five star jail cell: "He's a lovely, sweet guy who's been trying really hard to sort himself out. Jail isn't going to sort him out. I mean there are more drugs inside prison than there are out."

Yeah but he can't be on YouTube! And no cat house! They're probably starving to death in that den. Let Pete out for the pussies!

Mick produced both of The Libertines albums and the first Babyshambles album.

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