Cheers To Not Getting Laid!!

Do you want to have sex with this man?? To bad! Ladies you're going to have to keep it in your pants for a while because Calum is out of service. He's going on tv - MTV in fact - with one goal: don't have sex for 50 days. Totally Calum Best: The Best Is Yet To Come sounds like it could be the most interesting show MTV has ever come up with:

"His task starts on Tuesday June 17 and our cameras will watch his every move to see if he really can survive without the love of a good woman."

Can he? OMG! The dramz!!

(photo credit) 

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What What A Lindsay Lohan Sex Video

Well he likes to do it on tape! Calum Best, who was previously videoed in a three-hour orgy with two hookers and tons of blow, and another time having sex with Mick Jagger's daughter, has supposedly recorded a cell phone sex tape of himself and Lindsay Lohan. Well more like getting a BJ. Details! The pic above has been leaked. Of course it's Lindsay look at that amazing hair!

According to The Sun Lindsay is "freaking out because she can't remember it being filmed." And Calum is "having a frothy pint and patting his own back."

Well I added the Calum part. But they say it was leaked by Calum texting the cell phone sex video to his friends just after it happened. So far nobody is commenting.

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Calum Best Probably Gives The Herp

CelebSlam: Calum Best still gets chicks and dirty. You know he gives the herp. How can you not have the herp after all those hookers??

BWE: The Artic Monkeys, covered in crap.

Seriouslyomg: Amy Davis from American Idol looks pretty good in a bikini.

Yeeeah: Kim Kardashian has all kinds of sheez goin on back there.

POTP: Jason Wahler banned!

Gabby: Miley Cyrus wants to break free.

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Calum Best Caught Snorking Coke And Doing Two Hookers!

Calum Best has been captured on camera in he midst of a three-hour drug fueled orgy with $2,000/hour hookers. Best -- the ex-lover of Lindsay Lohan, Jade Jagger, Paris Hilton and Kimberly Stewart -- picked up one of the girls at his favorite club and she brought her Brazilian friend along for the ride. And what a ride it was. The Sun is there:

Lust-crazed Calum secretly captured on film romping with TWO hookers at a hotel...

Sex toys and a cat-o-nine-tails whip were used as he:

SNORTED lines of cocaine off a glass table while the naked vice girls looked on.

LICKED the Class A drug off one hooker's body and let both women pleasure him at once before romping with each in turn.
SHOUTED at one of them to “take a f*****g line" as drugs were laid out.

(Calum) dropped his pants as the girls, who used a rolled-up banknote to snort coke off a glass table, simultaneously pleasured him. Calum necked vodka and wine as he switched partners or romped with both.

I was going to say something bad about this, but I couldn't really think of anything. This is the stuff you dream about when at 15.

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Lindsay Lohan Has Met Her Match

Lindsay Lohan's new boyfriend has one outstanding rapsheet. Star Magazine put together a little profile of Calum Best.

Calum:

- "does a lot of coke and is a wild party boy who's notorious for his sexcapades"
- "keeps track of the women he has been with and by his count the number is way over 1.000!
- "his harem of girlfriends includes Lindsay's frenemies Kimberly Stewart and Paris Hilton!"

A friend of the pair tells Star that the two are a very lovey dovey couple:

On May 7, “they walked in (to NYC's 60 Thompson Hotel) holding hands and kissed as they got into the [elevator]. An eyewitness reported, “Then they went up to Lindsay's suite and put a Do Not Disturb sign on the door! On May 7 Lindsay proudly introduced Calum to her mom, Dina!

On May 11th the lovebirds took a private jet from New Jersey's Teterboro Airport to the Bahamas Paradise Island for the gala opening of the Cove Atlantic mega resort. Lindsay and Calum were inseparable; observers say they snuggled in a VIP section during a Janet Jackson performance and smooched nonstop at the Aura nightclub after parity.

But explain that to Calum. Model Sara Cova had a run-in with him on that Bahama trip. The NY Daily News is there:

"We'd exchanged looks. I was walking to the ladies' room when I passed him walking from the men's room. He gave me a smile. Then he put his hands on my hips and turned me toward the wall, like he was a cop who was about to frisk me. He held my hands so my booty would be pressed against his well, his crotch.
"I turned to move away. Then he grabbed by jaw and planted a kiss. I giggled. Okay, I might have been a little intoxicated. But I was also shocked. I didn't know this guy's name. The whole time, no words were spoken. Finally, I walked away. After I came out of the bathroom, I went back to the main room, and saw this same guy kissing Lindsay Lohan. She was kind of straddling him. I said to myself, What just happened here?'"

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Oops! Lindsay Lohan's Boob Gets Some Sun

Lindsay Lohan's boob needs a little sun too! It's no fun being a boob locked up all day when everyone else is out to play. Here's Lindsay's nipple getting a little sun tan:

Check out Egotastic! for more shots.

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